This Baby Boomer Not Converting to Crossfit

 

So, Martina walks into Crossfit as a fit pilates teacher and shares her horror, surprise and ultimate intrigue in her latest blog post. I am aghast!  How can my barrechat.com partner and the coolest person I know turn to religion?  Honestly, I am not the first to note that extreme fitness is the new religion.

“Ms. Huberlie described the CrossFit experience as an intimate, supportive one, in which cheering for one another to meet fitness goals was expected. It is a culture that can produce effects more often associated with church.

“There is something raw and vulnerable that happens to you when you go into the CrossFit gym,” Ms. Huberlie said. “A workout can bring you to your knees, so to speak.”   NYTIMES;2015 When Some Turn to Church, Others Go to Crossfit.

“At CrossFit—a worldwide workout phenomenon with 4 million users—the members exhibit a close-knit community of people trying to better themselves and those around them through physical fitness. Members have organized fundraisers and other drives to aid friends and other CrossFitters who are going through sickness and other extraordinary circumstances.”    Harvard Divinity School   Crossfit As Church

Fellow baby boomers; remember when you had to go to religious services?  Dressed in uncomfortable clothes, hours of Latin or Hebrew (never understanding a single word), forced to swallow a dry wafer, or enter a dark room to confess sins to a stranger when you were just 7 years old?

DAH!  I realize  I can  never be a Crossfit person, or a mudder.  I would never join Crossfit where the “BOX” is the church that demands a cultish following to complete the “WOD.”

Where fire breathers are the new saints. Where “paniacs” endure grueling workouts, and compare their suffering as “nothing compared to Jesus Christ”.

There is another reason.  I practice pilates and won’t convert to crossfit where exercise quality is confused with the amount of pain it produces ala “no pain, no gain.”

My practice informs that pain is a symptom of more than a hard workout; it often results from an injury.  Knowledge of anatomy and body mechanics, and respect for a typical injured boomer body leads me to avoid painful workouts and choose smart workouts. I am not looking to recreate an era of blissful ignorance.  It’s why I prefer an IPhone 7 over a rotary dial phone, high speed internet over AOL dial up service, and pilates over Crossfit.

Yesterday in advanced pilates we did an entire series of standing leg splits on the reformer.  My thighs started to burn and I felt the discomfort of lactic acid moving out of my muscles.  When we moved on to kneeling arm work the discomfort ceased.

My reaction to Crossfit type workouts is not as extreme as Nappercize, the newest fitness craze.

It’s a class that is based on a little stretching followed by a long nap in a group setting.  No kettleballs or heavy ropes required… just sleep masks. Is nappercize the new religious experience for over scheduled sleep-deprived people?  Are you listening Martina?   At least it can’t hurt you!

I Hate Lists!

  • I hate lists10 ways to improve your sex life.
  • 15 steps to better skin.
  • 9 ways to improve the manners of your children.
  • 10 ways to travel like a pro.
  • 12 products that will give you perfect hair.
  • 10 decorating tips to update your home.

You get it, right?  Everyone wants to be better, look better, travel better, but why is it so complicated?  Worse, it is a recipe for failure.  So I want to eat healthier and I nail five out of 10 tips so that’s only 50% or a failing grade in school.   Who is writing these lists?  I think they are product or lifestyle salespeople who want us to fail so that they are not out of job.  Have you noticed that these lists appear over and over again in the same places?  If Vogue magazine had the secret to perfect hair, we would all buy the magazine and have perfect hair and never feel the need to read another hair product list. But alas, no one can complete the checklist so they are free to repeat and tweak the list for a future publication.

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Religion of Motivation

inspirational quotesNot proud to confess that I read People magazine on airplanes during every takeoff.  I am forced to read a magazine because the FAA doesn’t allow me to read my Kindle during the only stressful time of the flight. You know the drill from the flight attendants; if it has an on/off switch, turn it off.

Please don’t remind me that I could be reading the Economist or Atlantic Monthly.  I simply don’t find those mindless enough for takeoffs or landings.

I love reading People Magazines Mail Bag, or commonly called “letters to the editor.”

This post is dedicated to Michelle Altenhoof Carlsblod, CA.

Michelle wrote a letter to People in response to her favorite issue, the yearly Half Size issue. She credits the Half Size issue of People with helping her   “maintain her size 2 figure year after year.”

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Ode to Charlene

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAWith today being Mother’s Day, I thought it was time to give barrechat readers an introduction to Charlene…For those of you who haven’t figured out who Charlene is, she is my mother. She is somewhat of a character. She is loud, opinionated, swears like a truck driver, over reacts in almost every situation, and worst of all, she is a republican (although she claims to be independent).

You see, Charlene and I have an interesting relationship. Even though we live 600 miles apart, we are very close. I talk to my mom EVERY day. I check in with her at least once a day and if I don’t, she is pretty much convinced I’m dead in a gutter. People ask me, “What do you guys talk about if you talk every day?!?” Well… the answer is we chat about everything and anything. Everything is up for “discussion” with Charlene. Here is a typical conversation between us:
Charlene: “When are you having another baby?”
Me: “Mom!”
Charlene: “Well are you guys at least trying yet?”
Me: “Mom! Will you stop.”
Charlene: “You better get to it…let me talk to my son-in-law”
Kevin: “Hi Charlene”
Charlene: “You better give her a couple glasses of wine tonight so you two can work on making babies.”

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Mark Zuckerberg We Need a Dislike-Thumbs Down Button

facebook-dislikeWhen will Facebook have a “Dislike-thumb down” button?

“Like-thumb-up “ is overused and often inappropriate on Facebook.

The new “Dislike-thumbs down” button would be the perfect response to the endless banal updates about being at Starbucks, eating licorice at home, changing your baby’s diaper, getting ready for bed.  Thumbs down would be gentler than the snotty comments that usually begin with, “ I wish a certain someone would stop remarking on blah blah blah.”

Maybe the annoying people would get the message and stop with their endless updates and then the mean people could stop writing snotty comments.

And when people post updates that fall way beneath the threshold for sympathy, such as “I had a tooth pulled, I have a headache, I had a bad day, “ we can show solidarity by clicking on “Dislike-Thumbs Down.”

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Bill Maher, Can We Be #34?

bill-maherI didn’t think I would ever write another blog about twitter but something happened this morning. You know that Barrechat girls do not follow endless fitness and health gurus. For obvious reasons. Read our description.

You know that we like to laugh.  So this morning I started following Bill Maher. I was hopelessly in love with Bill Maher until I saw the tweet from Donald Trump @ realdonaldtrump:  everyone should cancel HBO until they fire low life dummy Bill Maher. Forget love; I adore Bill Maher. I hate Bill Maher haters.

Could not help but notice that two million people follow Bill Maher and he only follows 33. He is incredibly selective and super critical about who he follows. Would he ever follow barrechat? For reasons other than my unrequited adoration? With only 33 people to analyze can I find an algorithm to his picks?

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Is TWITTER Smarter Than Me?

barrechat-twitter-followIf you are reading this you know barrechat is a new blog.  After blog secured we secure   Twitter and Facebook barrechat account so we can annoy the hell out of our followers.

When I signed into barrechats twitter account for the first time a popup said ‘suggested people to follow”

See  screenshot so that we are both on the same page.

Who chose these people for barrechat?  A quick glance and it was scary.

Starbucks?  Do they see our studio Credit  Card?

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